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CHRIST FIRST UMC
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Day 211 | Friday, 16 October 2020

10/16/2020

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Day 211 - Audio Version

Day 211 | Friday, 16 October 2020

From the Church Mouse

It seems natural, in the COVID world in which we live, that our minds would wander from time to time to a future when we can travel to see our children and grandchildren, to shop in an actual store, even if we don’t buy anything, to eat inside a restaurant, or to go just anywhere at all.
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I remember the first time Doug and I were to travel to Maryland to see our son David and his family. We decided to buy a Garmin GPS to help us find our way. As we entered the black hole, otherwise known as Harrisburg, PA, Doug heard for the first time, the dreaded “recalculating”. Recalculating, according to The Urban Dictionary, is a polite way of saying "you messed up, idiot, try it again." A GPS says " recalculating " after you miss a turn it told you to take, then it comes up with a new route based on your current position. As we have learned, over time, in navigating the black hole, that we must disregard the obvious negative effects of following the directions of the malicious robot and figure it out ourselves. I’m waiting for when I can purchase a seniors GPS that will tell me not only how to get to my destination but will also tell me why I wanted to go there in the first place.
 
NOW FOR SOME HUMOR: We have checked out joke and cartoon, so now it’s time for spoof. Definition of spoof by The Free Dictionary.

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Spoof - a composition that imitates or misrepresents somebody's style, usually in a humorous way. parody, charade, lampoon, mockery, burlesque, caricature, impersonation, imitation - a representation exaggerated for comic effect.
The following starts out with the truth: Back in the day, a new GPS unit did really malfunction on the International Space Station.
New GPS Unit on International Space Station is Malfunctioning
A Space Shuttle mission by Discovery delivered a new Global Positioning Unit to the International Space Station this week. The new GPS unit, however, is not working. Instead of placing the station 26,000 miles above the earth in orbit, the new unit is currently reading that the crew is located at Ed Earl's Auto, Front End, Body, and Paint shop in Muleshoe, Texas.
Ed Earl could not be reached for comment, but his wife Erlene said that "we ain't seen no space stations in these parts lately, but them UFO's kidnapped my brother in law last October.  Officials from NASA apologized that the new unit was not working, saying that "we bought the most expensive one that they had at Radio Shack. It even came with a free Christmas CD that we sent along so the astronauts would have something to listen to when the holidays come around."  NASA officials came to the conclusion that the new GPS was reading the Muleshoe location because the International Space Station happened to be in orbit over that spot at the time.
  
If your GPS is a God’s Positioning System
Check out these images...
The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?
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    Rev. Douglas Knopp, Pastor Emeritus

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